The Marquis de Sade

is my dentist. It had been 5 years since I had gone, mostly because I haven't had coverage since 2001 and I don't really like him.

This is how a visit to the dentist goes: An attractive woman in a uniform makes you lie vertical, gives you a bib, orders you around and treats you like a baby. She inflicts an unbelievable amount of pain, uses her cruel tools to maximum effect, gives you a wollypop and then you pay her $250 for the hour of her ministrations.

Mr. Sade: You have done excellent work in your ground breaking "Sadist in Training (SIT) program". However, I implore you to be a bit more forthright in your business plan. Until your staff is dressed in leather bustiers with a cat of nine tails, I will not be returning on the principle of it and will choose to donate my mouthfuls of blood to the Red Cross instead. See you in five years.

Mrs. Google: I know you aren't going to believe this, but I have never searched for S&M cartoons before. Thanks for hooking me up with something mildly appropriate in 0.15 seconds.